Let’s all strip naked to make a point – Abiodun Kuforiji Nkwocha

Let’s all strip naked to make a point – Abiodun Kuforiji Nkwocha

Stella Nyanzi stripped naked!

Her office at the Makerere Research Institute in Uganda had been locked up for 3 days preventing her from entering. On the third day, she removed every stitch of her clothing in protest and her office was opened up… “to douse a tense situation” it was said.

I initially thought her crazy. A mother of 3, with a far from perfect body baring it all… just plain crazy.

But I now think she is a genius and perhaps this is the solution women have been waiting for.

When a woman strips, the world (whom Dr Stella described as phallic) sits (or stands as it may) at attention.

Stella Nyanzi
Stella Nyanzi

I think Nigerian women should pick a day and time and conduct nationwide protests, naked. We should write the word PROSTITUTE on our foreheads and scream out obscenities.

Why do some Nigerian men call women prostitutes when they have a disagreement? They throw out the epithet as though prostitution is something a woman does alone with herself.

I was in a bus at Ninth Mile, and the usual struggle for space resulted in a verbal fight between a man and a woman. The man shut her up by saying. “Yeye woman, no be you dey Sunshine (not the real name) Hotel at so and so place. You know me. You dey sell for there…”
Of course he called her a prostitute. I even thought it was true at first till I realised he just wanted to get to her. She realised it was futile arguing and kept quiet. Shamed into silence.

It happened again at Old Airport Junction in Jos. Fight about space in a bus again (my life jumping buses is hopefully in my past whether Buhari and his people like it or not). The man called the woman “Karuwa” (Prostitute in Hausa). Unfortunately from him, this woman probably shames shame for a living.

She held him by his collar and told him categorically that he could not afford what she charged. The bus had to stop for them to be settled.

Linda Ikeji vs Wizman (biko, he has 2kids, so  am helping him retire the ‘kid’ part of his name.) Linda is a prostitute that will never marry… sorry I mean, she will marry only her laptop. Besides, living on Banana Island is meaningless without a ‘banana’… Chai Nigerian women, una doh!!!

See ehn, if Oprah was a Nigerian, regardless of the tons of charitable acts she has done and is still doing, she would have been called a ‘Prostitute’ for reaching to the top of her career and also be told that she is nothing because she is not married and does not have children (no, those kids she mentors and pay for their education do not count.) I don’t want to get started with the following statements that get thrown around when a man and a single woman are arguing.

“See person wey wan marry…”

“Shut up and marry.”

“Na who go marry this one keep?”

“Prostitute like you…”

In Nigeria
No husband= Prostitute

No children= Prostitute with a million abortions in her past

High Profile job (even with a husband and children)= PROSTITUTE (permit the shouty caps, I just wanted to emphasis the severity of this level of prostitution).

By some complex extrapolation only some Nigerian men understand:

Woman= Prostitute

I know someone that says it is impossible to work in an airline as a female without being a prostitute. Another said the same thing for music and movie entertainment industries in Nigeria.

On Wednesday 20th of April 2016, the Comptroller General of the Nigerian Prisons Service sat comfortably in his car watching his aides beat up a lawmaker, Rep Joan Mrakpor. I was not too perturbed by that. I actually thought it was quite ‘feminist’ of him not to have any regard for her gender watching his boys give her a manly treatment. What disturbs me is that I hear she was called a Prostitute amongst other names. I immediately withdrew the feminist card I gave him (who qualified me to be giving cards?). If a highly placed National lawmaker gets called a prostitute then what woman stands a chance?

Prostitution in Nigeria is gender sensitive. Wait is it just in Nigeria? The definitions I looked up all had ‘typically a woman’ included. Yeye men must have written that. God bless Wikipedia that was clinical (without discrimination) in their definition.

Prostitution apparently is a female thing. And all Nigerian women that dare to have misunderstandings with men or are highly placed or even just basically have vaginas are prostitutes.

You know what this means folks.

You were all born by prostitutes.

The irony is only a prostitute is guilty of prostitution. The seller gets all the flack and the buyer is nobly called a customer.

Did you get that? Customers that buy freely upandan will disturb our peace with a holier than thou attitude shouting ‘Prostitute’ to whoever so much as brushes against them accidentally.

I have thought and thought about a lasting solution. The million and one rants on Social Media don’t seem to ripple the surface of this situation. Tomorrow, there will be another fight and another woman will be called ‘prostitute’ and life will go on. What do you expect from a ‘phallic’ world?

So how do we get attention to this?

How do we let Nigerian men see that it is not ok to call a woman that you have never bought sex from a prostitute? My solution is Dr Stella Nyanzi.

I call on all Nigerian women, to choose a particular day to do a Nyanzi. Let us bare it all.

Our fallen breasts, our CS scars, our stretch marks, dimples and cellulite. Our tiny waists and our child bearing thickened middles. Because when men persist in calling us prostitutes just because we are women; that is what they are doing to us. Stripping us.

Stripping us of our hard work. (Prostitution is hard work though… but una catch my drift..)

Stripping us of our dignity.

Heaping us with shame for being women.

I remember during the incessant attacks on the people in Vom by Fulani Terrorists, the women got fed up. Despite soldiers camped in their midst, people were dying. So they stripped and wailed. Bare breasted women everywhere. The soldiers left and I am not sure they ever came back. It is like the message is clearer when we are naked.

So what say you girls? Get into formation abi? (Rest assured, Obiageli Fire; my alter ego, will not be in the front during this march, she is shy…)

Lastly I hear Dr Stella was suspended from the institute… I wonder if some more nudity will rescind that…


photo credit


Previous posts by Abiodun

Feminism has to do with who washes plates o – Abiodun Kuforiji Nkwocha

Believe me, every woman needs a boob job – Abiodun Kuforiji Nkwocha

Sometimes I hate being a mother – Abiodun Kuforiji Nkwocha

About The Author

Osigweh Lilian Oluchi is a graduate of the University of Lagos where she obtained a B.A (Hons) in English, Masters in Public and International affairs (MPIA). Currently works with 1stnews as a Database Manager / Writer. [email protected]

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