Every day Mother’s Day, every day Mother’s Day. Is it fair?Well, I don’t know how to answer that, but I’ll try.
We may not all be feminists, we should not all be feminists and matter of fact, it is okay not to be; but everyday should be Mother’s Day, we should all embrace that.
One of my best videos to watch ironically, does not involve humans, but chickens.
You know all these short social media video clips of a minute or less? Those ones.
A cock and hen are eating from a bowl, the chicks are around them. The cock focuses on the food and just eats. He doesn’t even look up, not for a moment.
The hen on the other hand, for every one peck of grain for herself, she deposits one on the ground for the chicks. The cock couldn’t be bothered – every man for himself and God for us all.
The maternal instinct is alive in all creatures, you do not need to be capable of critical thought to understand that these are your offspring, you spent a lot of time, effort and yes – labor; forcing a watermelon through a key hole and this is literal for all species; so except for some isolated cases where the mother turns on its own young, you want to provide and protect them with all that you’ve got.
A couple of weeks back, a friend called and asked us to get ready to go shopping.
You know how women are with the word “shopping”; we were ready in a heart beat. It was meant to be an unwinding session, just go round the shop and knock yourselves out. Again, we were ready.
So we got to the shop and it was a farmer’s market. All wholesome and organic goods fresh from the farm, and a lot of goodies spun from all the organic stuff.
The instruction at the door: let yourself go. Don’t shop for anyone else, just treat yourself to whatever you want and with that, we dispersed off to various parts of the market.
When we met later, everyone was ladened down with bags, I didn’t give it much thought until we got home and everyone started unpacking their stuff.
See goodies jumping out from everyone’s bag.
Ice cream. Salads of all sorts. Baked goods. Grilled stuff. Sweet stuff. You name it. Everyone was organizing and labeling their stuff because of stories that touch.
Then I began to unpack my own shopping bags.
Two bags of onions because we had run out of onions just yesterday.
Tomatoes were cheap, so I bought a basketful for stew.
The chickens are organic, I am tired of cooking with chicken that disintegrates as soon as it hits the pot.
Fruits for fruit salad.
Peanut oil because I suspect this one would be more authentic than the stuff they sell in the shops. Etc.
By the time we turned out our loot and tallied them up, while everyone else had been having fun and spoiling themselves a little; yours sincerely was still locked in the Christian Mother mindset, and had spent all her allowance like a good Christian mother, on household stuff.
Just as we left the shop, I had seen some sea salt caramel taffy and picked two.
And those couple of sweets, my friends, was the only nod to “spoil yourself a little”; that I had in my shopping basket.
The rest was literally “general market”; and I also turned to “Julius Berger” thereafter. Begging up and down.
Hey please, your shrimp salad looks good; can I have a bite?
What flavor ice cream is that? Looks good. Can I taste?
Are you sure that hot milk cake is good for human consumption? Does it have NAFDAC number? Bring it, let me check.
And I also know that this is not unique to me.
Very many mothers would immediately go into “Christian Mother” mode under the same circumstances; thinking about what the household needs vis-à-vis what she personally wants.
That, is another reason why everyday should be Mother’s Day.
No, I am not even going to go into the pregnancy/labour/childbirth argument.
Anyone who doesn’t understand why women should be celebrated everyday because of that alone, needs to experience at least ovulation. Or one menstrual cycle.
We will be available for further discussions after that.
I am talking about all those times your mother declares an emergency fast, not because she is on any spiritual journey, but because she knows that if she eats, you will not have enough for a decent meal.
For all those times your mother declared that human hair was a “waste of money”; opting instead for N750 Yaki hair which she used and re-used to infinity; because she needed to pay rent, school fees or something.
For all the times Mama sat by the road roasting corn or fish or selling mangoes, just to pay your school fees.
For those days when, while you snored your way through the night, Mama was awake observing one vigil or the other; sending prayers your way to ensure your future would be brighter.
For all these and more too numerous to mention here, everyday should be Mother’s Day.
Dear men, we have given you all June 16. One day to thank you for not killing us with hypertension.
And stop envying the other 364 plus days we have reserved for ourselves.
We deserve it.