I hate stereotypes, especially the ones that have to do with Nigerian women. I hate it with such passion. Why? Because they contribute to contribute heavily to the dysfunctional class system. Once a stereotype is perpetuated and not challenged or addressed; it can leave one to infer that this stereotype is true.
From there, it is easy to generalize that assumption to all people of said characteristics.
Apparently, one of the stereotypes that seems to be popular in Africa and probably around the world now; is the assumption that Nigerian women love money, that they are gold diggers …So, dating them would lead to the financial suicide of any man.
The funny thing is that quite a number of men around the continent actually believe this; even when they have not had any personal experience with Nigerian women. Their conclusions are based on hearsays and recounts from friends who have dated Nigerian women.
If I am being honest, having money is indeed one way to make a Nigerian woman; (as well as any woman) feel more confident about being in a relationship with you. But guess what, it’s not just Nigerian women. It is women everywhere in the world!
Women are wired to go for men who offer better security. It’s innate. Same way some animals would not mate with diseased males.
The thing though is this, financial prowess certainly is not the only way to get Nigerian women; as there are a lot of guys who have plenty of money but can’t get a Nigerian girl to date them. Likewise, a number of hot Nigerian women are dating broke guys who do not earn much or give them anything at the moment. The problem is rooted in the fact that men refuse to believe there is more to the equation than cash. They screw up and everything eventually falls to sh*t; simply because they rely on money to get these Nigerian women to desire and stay in relationship them.
Nigerian women are not monsters who are only out to get your cash. They have feelings, they have emotions and they recognize such terms as patience, commitment and compromise. They can understand. If you don’t have money or have issues spending the money you have, be open and honest. The average Nigerian girl will not quit on you!
Sure, traditional dating involves night outs: full-blown dinners, cocktails at ‘tush’ bars, the movies, music/comedy shows or the tiny little extras; like stopping on the way home for cold stone ice cream and chicken wings. But there are so many things to do that would appeal to a Nigerian girl without you having to spend money and she will be alright.
And yes, there is the pressure to give at least four gifts: Birthday, Valentine’s Day, Anniversary and Christmas annually. But with a Nigerian girl, you really don’t have to. She is not an unreasonable girl. She’s not standing there demanding you buy her diamond earrings or take her on an exotic trip each time. She just wants a present every once in a while, like every other girl in the world.
And that’s fair.
You do not have to go overboard with the gifts either. Do something meaningful for her. You could get a radio station to call her in the morning; or surprise her in her office with an affordable cake from Cakes and Cream. You could even take advantage of deals and coupons for affordable hotel staycations, wellness, and facial treatments; or even short lessons you can do together. Believe it or not, the thought is what counts.
This is 2020. Modern Nigerian women thrive on their independence. They don’t need any man’s money to have a sense of value. Paying for dates or other things that may come up in the course of the relationship will not seem a big deal to her as it gives her a feeling of equality and balance. It validates her independence and assures her that you are not trying to “buy” her affection. Yes, a Nigerian woman!
Bottom line: The stinking stereotype about Nigerian women only caring for man’s money needs to be squashed. Love is not cheap anywhere in the world…and it is possible to date a Nigerian girl without financial hassles. The secret lies in being sincere about your financial capabilities; more importantly…being creative.
There’s nothing like creativity to stretch your Naira and the love. Stop justifying your lack of creativity and small-mindedness with a worthless stereotype.