Nobody will stress you like artisans! – Ella Temisan

Nobody will stress you like artisans! – Ella Temisan

 

 

 

Do you see artisans? Carpenters, mechanics, tailors, painters, all of them? They will stress the loving saviour out of you!

 

Wow! Are these artisans made of more rigid flesh and bitter blood? Because I can’t understand how they act like they’re not human. Artisans are mean o.

 

How has this carpenter refused to come and hang my bedroom door for over two weeks? I have called, begged, threatened even when I don’t have the power to do anything to him. But the man has refused to budge. The saddest part is that I have paid him 80% of his money.

 

 

Wait, that’s not even the saddest part. I had already paid another carpenter plenty of money for the same door. And did that one provide? Nope! He disappeared! Took my money and just vanished! I couldn’t believe my eyes or my doorless room.

 

 

You needed to see the first carpenter, Bello. So simple looking. He always had a short pencil and was always looking for a sheet of paper to write measurements down on. Anything you tell him, he’ll say “Ah, no be problem. I go do it kpa kpa kpa.”

 

ALSO READ: I don’t need motivational speeches this month, give me money – Ella Temisan

 

 

Kpa kpa kpa and he’ll disappear for days without a call. Then the day you accidentally get him on the phone, he’ll tell you how he had an accident and has been spending time in recovery. I swear that guy told me his grandmother died a few days after I paid him additional money to buy “hinges and lock”.

 

 

How did I fall for this scam? I don’t know where Bello’s workshop is. Also, I don’t know where he’s from or what his other jobs look like. I just know a contractor in my area introduced me to him and I trusted him with my project and my money. Now Bello is nowhere to be found. No door, no Bello.

 

 

As if that was not enough, I paid another carpenter to give me the same door. And guess what? No door yet! Is there a problem with doors that I am not aware of in Lagos State? Has there been an embargo placed on wooden doors? I just want to replace my door and lock my room in peace! Why can’t I have that?

 

 

I think my problem starts from my being too trusting of these artisans. Plus the fact that I don’t like stress. So, I contract such tasks out and sit back to expect a job well done. My mother warned me that this big woman’s life will put me in trouble. But I didn’t listen. Now, look at me.

 

 

I will keep hoping this new carpenter comes through. But meanwhile, this might be a good time to sign up on one of those hire help platforms. Maybe technology will save my life?

About The Author

Osigweh Lilian Oluchi is a graduate of the University of Lagos where she obtained a B.A (Hons) in English, Masters in Public and International affairs (MPIA). Currently works with 1stnews as a Database Manager / Writer. [email protected]

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