True story about the side chick phenomenon…
Hear me out first as I am sure this is not new story to most of us. We must have heard, read, seen this type of thing happen before.
It was a burial ceremony, years back. The man, a devout Christian dad, husband, community leader, the type of man women taunted their husbands about. “See Mr. So and So, he is not carrying women all over the place like you…”
Anyway, at the burial site, while the immediate family and friends stood around a casket and the pastor droned on about eternal life; a woman approached the edge of the grave. She asked people to move aside so she could get to where the casket was. Thereafter, she demanded to be given the same right of position and attention given to the widow and her kids. She pulled along two children, twin boys whom she claimed belonged to the man.
Then people gave her a wide space!
Only a blind man would say the kids didn’t belong to the dead man. They were his spitting image!
There was commotion, there were furtive glances, loud murmurings. Even the pastor at the grave site kept chanting, ‘Jesus, Jesus,’ like he was seeing a ghost. The man, the dead one, I mean, had led a double life, obviously. He was a Deacon at the church, but he was one Deacon with two women; one for everyone to see and a secret one no one knew about…until that day. Well, let’s say a few knew about her – his driver, a few friends, maybe his siblings, too. These are usually the ones who know such things. The wife is often the last to know.
Anyway, the real widow, I mean the main woman, who hitherto had collapsed several times in tears as she was led to the grave site, sprang to action upon seeing she had a rival. She picked up a nearby shovel and began to destroy the casket…She had done a bit of damage before she was overpowered and led away but not before we; the mourners, heard her cursing the dead man and praying he would rot in hell!
A few days ago, we heard JJ Rawlings, former President of Ghana, died from complications of COVID-19…Oh! What a loss!
What a loss to Ghana, what a loss to Africa as a whole!
He is the highest profile victim of COVID-19 in Africa, I think.
I was privileged to meet him in 2001 or thereabout when work took me to Ghana, and we had dinner at his house. His booming voice and his general mien were endearing. I was impressed that a former president, an African president for that matter, lived in simplicity. Simple and humble furnishing in the medium-sized living room. There were no bustling servants.
Nana herself, the President’s wife opened the door for us when we knocked. She served us tea herself, carrying the tray from the kitchen to where we sat and talked.
There were no huge chandeliers, no over-prized gaudy furniture, a feature of Nigerian politicians both past and present. In fact, the only piece of ostentatious living was the huge TV in the living room. It looked like a gift that wouldn’t fit in the entire arrangement of that house.
The Ghana we have today is a pride not just to us West Africans, but to the entire black world. All of these can be traced back to JJ Rawlings…A man who seized power to restore order to his country’s economy and voluntarily gave it back.
He seized it a second time and after putting systems and structure in place, voluntarily stepped down again…Rare in Africa.
Then he died and we found he had a side chick and then the mudslinging has begun.
The weekend was replete with news of JJ Rawlings’ side chick, who even has a 21-year-old son for him. Many say the boy looks like Rawlings. Mrs. Side chick, aka nath_yamb as she is identified on Instagram, came out to show herself, describing him as her soulmate.
So, we are asking, why did she come out?
Is it because of a need to let the world know she brought joy, pleasure to the man?
To let the world finally accept her, after staying in the shadows for so long?
For her son? That he finally will be recognized, seen and not hidden? The boy deserves to be known by the rest of his siblings, especially as their father is high profile…?
Whatever the reason Mrs. Side Chick nath_yamb had in mind, social media won’t let her rest for some time to come. As usual, there are several factions. Some think her coming out would mar the ‘rightful’ Mrs. Rawlings from going through this period of grief, since she will no longer be the star attraction to this grief.
Did the ‘rightful’ Mrs. Rawlings even know about her husband’s dalliance? Or was there an agreement as some people are suggesting between her and JJ that he could go ahead and have an affair outside so long as it didn’t interfere with their public lives? Is that why nath_yamb published the photos and openly declared her love for the late ex- President?
And anyway, who says the side chick, nath_yamb isn’t also legally married to JJ? After all, in Africa, the culture of marrying more than one wife isn’t odd. So, nath_yamb, may also be Mrs. Rawlings two, the one who will never be openly or publicly acknowledged.
Being a side chick can’t be easy. Every move has to be under-G. You can’t be seen in public with your man except in certain quarters. You can’t openly post photos celebrating your lives on social media because then people will know and come for you. Your relationship was born in secret and must remain a secret; at least, until he dies or until you get caught!
So as the main guy is dead, should the side chick be buried along with him?
I have no answers, really.
However, I feel for both Nana and nath_yamb. To have loved a man they now feel didn’t give them his all must leave a nasty after-taste; to have made sacrifices for a man and now realise, he preferred her to me; he spent more time with her than me; was he thinking of her while he was with me? I was never enough; he didn’t leave her for me…
And as for the kids, well, that is another talking point for another day
May JJ Rawling’s soul find rest. May he not be judged only by his matrimonial faux pas…