When your side chick jams your madam, boy you are finished! – Peju Akande

When your side chick jams your madam, boy you are finished! – Peju Akande



Did you see the video of a side chick who cornered a guy and his wife in a supermarket?


Like our former first lady would say.




In brief, a side chick, who had been thoroughly enjoyed by a married guy and who must have invested a substantial sum of money in her married boyfriend’s life had been dumped by the guy…for two years.


Maybe he borrowed money from her to pay his children’s school fees or sponsor his wife’s business…Whatever he used it for. Anyway, I suspect he relocated from where his side chick was and came to Lagos. In doing so, he cut off all contact with the side chick!




My guy, you don’t do that to a woman, not especially after you’ve had sex with her! Naturally, side chick got mad and when women get mad like that, they turn to witches!


She must have cried; she must have cursed and one day rose from her tears with one goal…


‘‘I’m gonna get him!”


She had been tailing the man for over two years. Someone must have tipped her off…You know, (when you become a witch, you have mean contacts) that the guy regularly shops at that supermarket. Side chick came to the store with her ally camera chick who was rolling tape as she confronted the man.


“I told you I will trace you, didn’t I? Abi? Record this…”


ALSO READ: Ijeoma: Why do women blame the side chick? – Peju Akande



The dumbfounded guy stares sheepishly at her, his mind working many scenarios;


Option 1: Ground, open up and swallow me; now!


Option 2: Let my wife suddenly be transported home so she doesn’t see this girl!


Option 3: Let this girl disappear forever and I will never cheat on my wife again, forever and ever. I promise you God, pleaseee!


But none of the three options worked.


Madam is in his face. She had seen someone filming and a small crowd gathering around side chick and her husband. So, she demands from her husband, “Who is this?”


Not to be outdone, side chick also demands, “You, who are you?”


Instead of answering both women, our confused guy responded with; “What are you doing in Lagos?”




Thing is, women know who is who in situations like this.


Side chick declares, “Nothing concern me, o.”


Madam also got the full gist in that nano second…This must be his girlfriend. She immediately declared, “I will not fight over a man.”


Anyway, I’m sure you can make your own deductions from the video. You don’t need me to speculate on your behalf but here is my main grouse with the guy.


When your side chick jams your madam, boy you are finished! – Peju Akande



Guy, this is a major eff-up!


Major because both home and abroad are mad at you!


On the side chick’s part, you have used her freely for some time, promised her heaven on earth; probably taken her money and then you ‘shenked’ her because you suddenly remembered you have a wife…you try!


For two years she called, sent you text messages, all of which you ignored!


“Whyeee?”  In Patient Jonathan speak, “whyee?”



Side chick will get her revenge, make no mistake. She doesn’t care if madam has now found out. She doesn’t care that the world has seen her or even that you are disgraced. In fact, she still wants blood and with your face out there; other side chicks are fast closing their legs telling one another…that bobo na fake!



Then you have madam to contend with!



Maybe you had just finished making love with her that afternoon before deciding to go shopping together as husband and wife; with madam sporting a sexy pair of bum shorts and looking loved up…I suspect she must have promised you some more love sessions after shopping…



Then you ruined it for her. You were not even convincing when you told her side chick was “a friend,” my guy, you are in hot soup! That’s why madam collected the car keys from you and left you stranded with side chick to do exactly as she wished with you.



Madam is mad! She may cook for you but will never care if you eat. She may be in your house but will never be concerned about your welfare. Indeed, she may continue to smile at you but her heart is elsewhere. She is plotting her own revenge and will nail you for cheating on her and disgracing her in public…



You can beg but she will not forget. You can try to make amend but she will never trust you again…and I can go on and on…



ALSO READ: Should a side chick bury her head in shame when her bobo dies? – Peju Akande




You scorned two women, my guy…you are well and truly effed!


Then I heard the video is a prank arranged by our guy to see madam’s reaction.





There’s still a lot to learn from the video. A woman scorned will come after you and this isn’t even about feminism. Your madam at home will lay a trap for you; the days of eating your cake and having it is over.



Declaring she won’t fight for a man is the way many are opting to go now and dear man, when she chooses not to fight over you, you’re sunk!

About The Author

Osigweh Lilian Oluchi is a graduate of the University of Lagos where she obtained a B.A (Hons) in English, Masters in Public and International affairs (MPIA). Currently works with 1stnews as a Database Manager / Writer. [email protected]

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