Why single and ‘sashing’ can’t mingle and marry – Peju Akande

Why single and ‘sashing’ can’t mingle and marry – Peju Akande


Yemi Alade’s song, “Single and Searching” has been trending for weeks now on social media; especially on Instagram, where hundreds of renditions are posted daily; from the cool to the beautiful to the weird and quirky to the downright hilarious.




Nigerian youth and youth world over, because our music is universal, have been posting ‘Single and Searching’ versions like crazy!



Not only are there different versions that are truly inspiring; there are versions that leave you wondering about the state of the minds that created them. What a time to be young and carefree; to be creative and show your talents to the world…in the smallness of your room!




And thanks to social media, we can view and repost…Then again, no thanks to social media, our youth who are single aren’t searching and mingling as they should.




Human beings are social beings but the present pandemic situation is making that a tad difficult.




Why single and ‘sashing’ can’t mingle and marry – Peju Akande



But COVID-19 aside, millennials seem to enjoy their own company better than the company of others. They are obsessed with their phones and their social standing on social media. That, to my mind, is kind of difficult to compete with. They’d rather pay attention to their virtual friends than to those who are physically present.






This malaise is a youth thing. Apart from the advancement of technology, parents like me may also have contributed to enabling a generation of distracted youth. Haven’t you seen parents calm agitated babies with phones and remote control just to get them to stop crying? Haven’t you seen parents turn on cartoons or music videos on their screens just to keep the young ones at one spot?




Rather than let them go out to play with their mates; we keep them indoors with devices until they become geniuses with the internet that lack social skills.




No wonder many grew up as individuals who are individualistic in their view of life. So, maybe we should just stop whining about this new Me-Alone generation. I spoke with a few of them recently and if you were listening in; you’d get the sense that they’ve trashed the traditional way of doing things. They will only allow their personal spaces to be invaded so long as it benefits them. There’s no doing things for the sake of the community, no.




I nodded at this explanation, even though I didn’t understand it one bit!




I belong to the ancient generation that says, let’s do this for the benefit of all.



Why single and ‘sashing’ can’t mingle and marry – Peju Akande




But that aside, I now see why a lot of our youths are telling themselves they will never get married. They cite situations like the video I saw (the one that claimed Nigerian women topped world’s most unfaithful wives in the world…adunbelivit!). They cite instances where partners are free to ‘cavort’ with other partners of the same sex…. Also, they cite the fear of heartbreak; they even cited the former FCMB MD’s paternity debacle.




All of these excuses are as old as life!



When we fall, we will rise again. There would always be reasons not to commit to a lasting relationship.







I may be too old to get it. But while we are on the topic of single and searching, you should check out the different versions of slowmo single and searching videos on Instagram.




They are truly something!






Video credit

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